Harrison left for church camp today.
My normally outgoing, go-go-go kid was his normal excited self.
Until he saw his mama crying.
Then he thought maybe he didn't want to go to camp afterall.Apparently, the tears I tried really hard to avoid letting him see got the best of him.
Sweet boy.
I'm not proud of myself, trust me. =/
Things were a little shaky there for awhile, but he got on the bus, and as I type this, I imagine he is having a blast with the new friends he most likely made within the first few minutes of the bus ride.
Because that's the kind of kid he is.
Resilient. Strong. Outgoing.
And still sensitive, sweet, and concerned about the feelings of others.
Like his super-emotional mom who worries that all of the changes we've faced these past few months may be getting to him.
In other words, being the new kid kinda stinks. I don't think sending him off to camp would have been nearly as hard if he'd had more time to make new friends. I'm used to him being in the big middle of lots of kids his age. Things are different this time around. Still lots of great people where we are now, don't get me wrong. People who know us, encourage us, and love us already. But when you leave a place where you had been literally since you were born like our kids have, with other kids who had been there equally as long, and go to a place that is completely different,
this is kind of an adjustment.
Which is exactly why we thought camp would be a great idea.
And I still think it is. I know that he is going to have an AMAZING time.
Trust me, if I didn't believe that with my whole heart, I would have snatched him up the second he had doubts and run for the hills. :)
No one said being a mom was easy.
And this whole, "let them spread their wings and fly" thing?
For the freakin birds. Literally. ;)
Missing him already, counting the days til I see that big smile on Thursday....trusting that God is going to do some awesome things in that sweet heart of his in the meantime.
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Totally teared up reading this. It's like getting part of your heart ripped out as you watch them "spread their wings." I agree it's for the birds! I can't believe how big he is. Still remember meeting him when he was born. Ahhhh, motherhood!
ReplyDeleteLetting go of your child is one of the toughest things about being a parent. Thankfully it seems we do just a little letting go at a time. Their first sleepover at their grandparents, then a sleepover at a friends, then 3-4 days at church camp, then a week long trip for drill team, music, cheerleading or whatever your interests are in high school, then college! Then the big let go of marriage. Of course really letting them go is when they move away.....you're right it is for the freakin birds :) Love, Mom
ReplyDeleteNo one can really prepare you for how hard it is to be a mom and begin to let those babies go. In fact, from the moment they are born, the process really starts. There is a book called 'Learning to Let Go' (I wouldn't read it this week if I were you) but it really is a wonderful book. It talks about how as they grow, we let go a little more equipping them along the way where they eventually trust and depend on God more than they trust and depend on us as their mom. (maybe you weren't ready to hear that this week)But you are right, this mom job is tough! (Doesn't get any easier when they are grown and have their own families, by the way) Just two more days!! love ya Jac! Brenda Elmore
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